My dear readers and who visit when passing,
l really thank you for you reading, because l like to share so much and this really makes me feel happier and lighter.
In the end of this year, if need to say the truth, l wasn’t planning to write something for a new year. Because in year ends and beginnings l look for my loved ones or lover around, l don’t know but l care it so much. If l wanted somebody to be with me and he/she is not with me in that important day, l feel sorry. This year it’s the first time l feel so weird about, but it is still ok. It has to be. At least l’m not sorry because the same things anymore, what l’m sorry is people are so blind. Mostly blind about love. Some people are not aware of the things they are paranoid of and they risk important things not to change and realise their paranoia, habits. Forget the things, love, the people they loose, they break the hearts.
Yes, l’m emotional in the end of the year and may be l’m not going to celebrate the new year coming with much enthusiasm, but hopefully going to greet with my hopes. May be l don’t have concrete wishes, but l believe God knows best things for me. l wish for everyone and for me love, happiness, health, peace and being with our loved ones always.
l feel that deep, peppery hot feeling inside my heart so real, being not able to share my love with my loved one, but l feel so great that l have my great friends l’m going to share my love. l trust the deepness of my heart and even 2012 was not so bright for me, sure not a bad year but, still some heartsick, bleak and sorry days. Still l’m so thankfull to God for everything and the things didn’t that bad.
If l look what l had this year, people around me changed so much in last years, but the constant best friends didn’t. l started to keep in touch with my very old friends again after years also. l was may be examined with some relations of human being, l hope l was good. l tried to be always but always sincere to people and when l loved a person, a lover or a friend. l tried my all for some friends and they were the most heart breaking for me. l can’t believe how l behaved so sincere to my loved one and his friends and how they didn’t care after a break up in the end. l’m so sorry, l started to see the people who are not sincere and just care the friends of their lovers because they have to, are cared more but l had really given my love. And found out my tears at the end. l sometimes got angry because l had cared them so much. Even l told all with these words so real, nobody cared. l am forgotten for them. But l’m greatfull to my friends near!
When you are sincere, you usually be accused of being the way too emotional. Now l see, when people told me l wasn’t wrong, l started to see the real. l just tried for my friendship.
So l’m hopeful for 2013 and want it to come and find myself in that new morning, without feeling my little alone side of my heart the night before. My heart is full and deep.
These are the wish-clothespins l took from coffee-shop (Kahve Dünyası) written “a husband who loves shopping” and “eat much, be fit” for new year. :)
And l found some photos on web of Nişantaşı (in İstanbul) with the new year concept of Toy Factory – Lead Soldiers.
Loves from İstanbul!
and from Akaretler/ Beşiktaş , a photo by Dilara